“Though the Witch knew the Deep Magic, there is a magic deeper still which she did not know. Her knowledge goes back only to the dawn of time. But if she could have looked a little further back… she would have known that when a willing victim who had committed no treachery was killed in a traitor’s stead, the Table would crack and Death itself would start working backward.” - Aslan, C.S. Lewis, The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe
Showing posts with label SWANK protocols. Show all posts
Showing posts with label SWANK protocols. Show all posts

The Benefits of Being Disliked



The Benefits of Being Disliked

Filed Under: Emotional Clearance | Status Collapse | Energetic Leadership

By Polly Chromatic | SWANK (Standards & Whinges Against Negligent Kingdoms)


If They Don’t Like You—Congratulations.

You’ve stopped shape-shifting.
You’ve stopped groveling.
You’ve stopped auditioning for a role in someone else’s insecurity theatre.

Being disliked is not a failure of personality.

It’s a sign you’ve withdrawn your psychic compliance.


What Dislike Actually Means:

  • You reflect back their false self too clearly.

  • Your boundaries interrupt their power trip.

  • Your joy exposes their self-abandonment.

  • Your calm wrecks their drama economy.

  • Your refusal to need them collapses their control grid.

They don’t dislike you.
They dislike the version of themselves they can’t sustain in your presence.


What You Gain When They Dislike You:

  • Clarity. You stop confusing performance with connection.

  • Clean energy. No more damp conversations soaked in obligation.

  • Time. You stop managing their feelings and start managing your empire.

  • Power. Your nervous system stops calculating how to shrink.

  • True mirrors. You make space for those who love you without needing you to self-edit.


Let Them Mumble.

Let them call you:

  • Arrogant

  • Too much

  • Weird

  • Cold

  • Intimidating

  • Detached

What they really mean is:

“You’re free in a way I haven’t figured out yet.”
“You’re not asking me for crumbs.”
“You’re not emotionally rentable.”


In SWANK Terms:

Being disliked is emotional wealth.

It means you’ve exited the emotional capitalist economy.
You no longer perform likability as survival currency.
You are now:

An ungoverned frequency.

And the ones who can feel it
—will find you by vibration, not approval.



A Treatise on Nervous System Treason in the Age of Mirror Weakness



The Cost of Closeness: Boundary Protocols for the Energetically Unstable

Filed under: Mirror Discipline / Boundary Sovereignty / SWANK Relationship Hygiene

They don’t betray you on purpose.
They betray you because they can’t hold a signal.

Their nervous system isn’t loyal to truth.
It’s loyal to proximity.
Whoever’s closest owns their voice, edits their memory, and puppeteers their perspective.

Your presence stabilises them.
Your absence deletes you.

And so—your safety depends not on their affection,
but on your boundaries.


I. Assume They Deform Without Your Field

Do not assume:

  • That your version of events will survive once you leave the room.

  • That they’ll challenge group-think or speak truth under pressure.

  • That their love will translate into defence.

They don’t remember who they are without mirroring.
So they won’t remember you either.

Boundary Script:
"I act based on patterns, not apologies.
I don’t trust your loyalty in my absence,
so I no longer rely on it in my presence."


II. Refuse to Debate the Distortion

They will say:

  • “I didn’t mean it like that.”

  • “I was trying to stay neutral.”

  • “You’re overthinking it.”

What they mean is:
“Someone else controlled my narrative, and I let them.”

Boundary Script:
"If your signal shifts when I’m not in the room,
you are not aligned enough to stay in my life."


III. Use Field Logic, Not Emotional Appeals

Your emotional explanations won’t land.
But energetic field declarations will.

Examples:

  • “If you speak their version, you don’t access mine.”

  • “If you mirror lies, I withdraw truth.”

  • “If your field is unstable, mine will not merge with it.”

No theatrics. Just bioenergetic hygiene.


IV. Require Collapse Before Re-Entry

Don’t reward temporary loneliness with reaccess.
Don’t let the confused orbit you.
Require them to:

  • Name the betrayal

  • Disown the distortion

  • Prove coherence through action

  • Anchor their own thinking

Boundary Script:
"Your return requires collapse, not comfort.
I’m not your nervous system. Stabilise yourself or stay out."


V. Protect Your Field from Contaminated Mirrors

Do not:

  • Speak to them while they’re influenced by others.

  • Allow emotional debris from groupthink to touch your clarity.

  • “Help them come back” while they’re still hijacked.

Let them spiral without dragging you down.
If they find their signal again, they’ll return different.
If not, they were never yours—only entrained.


Final Reminder:

You’re not being cold.
You’re being sovereign.

You’re not punishing.
You’re protecting.

You’re not cutting them off.
You’re refusing to fund nervous system freeloading.

Field first.
Always.

Documented Obsessions